Tomorrow's the big day for Megan. She's thrilled to be starting school. She's excited to meet her teacher tonight. She's excited to meet new friends and play at recess with all the kids surrounding her. She's excited to eat in the lunchroom. Just about everything she's heard about school excites her. She's a social butterfly and I pray she'll flourish. But.........
Mommy's as sad as can be. I'm sad she's leaving me. We've been together day and night 5 straight years (minus a few days here and there). She's been my world (and Anna), and I've pretty much been her world. She comes to me for everything. We do everything together. She's my eating buddy, my reading buddy, my game buddy, my puzzle buddy, my tickle buddy, my wake-me-up-early-in-the-morning buddy, my coloring buddy...you get the picture. Anyway, I can't stand the thought of her not being with me all day, and I sure can't stand the thought that I won't be "her world" anymore. She will be changing so much and things at school will quickly become a big part of her world.
In a way, I feel like the major part of teaching her is behind me. I know I've got years more of parenting and teaching, so let me explain what I mean. I've spent this time with her teaching her how to act, how to handle certain situations, etc. Now, I won't be there when things happen at her school to help her or direct her. It will be up to her to handle things on her own. She will be making decisions on her own based on the past 5 years. Kids will say and do mean things, and it's up to her and her completely to respond appropriately.
I feel in a sense that I'm setting a portion of her free from under my wings of protection. I pray God takes over and watches over her every move. I pray she has a wonderful teacher and wonderful friends. I pray she'll be a strong person with strong morals (even as a 5-year-old), and that she'll have a positive influence on those around her instead of others having a negative influence on her. I pray her first year will bring her great joy.
If I'm this bad with Kindergarden, what will I do when she leaves for college? Let's just stay far away from that thought as long as possible.
Please join me in praying for her success and happiness and for God's protection and blessings upon her life. Thanks!